I'm gonna get out of the music thing and put my time and energies into something I've always wanted to do, yep that's right time for me to become a geriatric doctor to rock and rollers. First up I'm in deep negotiations with Mick Mars from Motley Crue to create a wheelchair that any guitarist can play onstage, without wheels. It operates on jet packs, so that instead of running around said stage (like a moron) you can go from your spot on stage, to say behind the drum kit by simply playing the wrong note. If you play enough wrong notes you can get to the bus station to get you to your next gig. I'm also consulting with many,many old time rockers management teams on a device where they have a polyethylene tube attached from the penis and rectum that runs from inside the pant leg to the closest available restroom. This avoids the nasty accidents many of our old time R&R heroes experience while playing a two hour show. We have had one problem with this though as one of our very famous artists mixed up the polyethylene tube with the chord to his wireless microphone. Let me just tell you this "Enter Sandman" does not sound the same when the vocalist is constantly spitting between words. What has been the hardest thing to figure out is our prototype "rocker." We're trying to figure out a way to make all of our old rock-stars fit into a fake skinny body with their vocal range intact from when they first started out in the "business" and perfecting an alternative to receding hairline. Oh almost forgot... too many of our "stars" can no longer take drugs due to age limitations so I've consulted a Mister. Zimmerman on how to look and talk "stoned" while conducting interviews or while on stage or at any given awaken moment. So as you can see I've got my hands full, and I really don't have a lot of time for posting anymore. Anyway that's enough Bowie for a while. See Scans
IT'S NOT THE SIDE EFFECTS OF THE COCAINE
I'M A BREAKAGE INSIDE
Gracias por el aporte. Larga vida a uno de nuestros reyes.
ReplyDeleteAny chance of getting this re-uploaded? Thanks in advance!
ReplyDeleteWow Jobe thanks for this Bowie fest! The text at the end is one of the most surreal things I have read on t'interwebbie mcthingymabob but how much of this is true? Real? Fact? Don't leave us! Hanging on with desperation!!! What on earth or in the universe will we do without you?! AAAAAAGGGHH!
ReplyDeleteWhat? Are you saying that we aging rockers aren't as virile and energetic as we were in our (degree wasted) youth?
ReplyDeleteNow that I think about it, I suspect you are talking about me, what with a bulging waist line, receding hair line, no longer interested in concerts where I have to stand for two hours, never pass up a bathroom because you never know where the next one will be, etc.
But virile? I'l have you know I can still do the horizontal bop, but have 'learned' to be more efficient and can now accomplish the entire task in under a minute.
That's progress!
Regards, Dave.
HUGE THANK YOU for all the Bowie you can muster.
ReplyDeleteGreat music, thank you very much
ReplyDelete